After a certain point, sleeping seems silly. I am missing my cuz-a-muffins and I am excited to see a few of them shortly (even though only for a day each). I can not stop writing about my family, and I suppose that when I really decide to write something, something big, it will be about them, in some way or another. I've written about them since I was little, I remember doing a project in 3rd grade and writing about my awesome cousin Sydney who was a mountain biker and Windsor, and Ezra. There are other people whom I love now as well, I hope to someday intertwine all my loves, and be intertwined as well. I like learning things about people.
My cousins are slowly, but surely building their ideal lives and this makes me so happy and a little hopeful for myself. I told Kai "I think this is our year, as a whole Welchy group." Not that it is not without its hiccups, but this year is full of potential, more than other years have been. We are all so the same, we are all so different, a Welchy puzzle of sorts. I know I am proud, too proud, to be a part of this strange group. In some ways I wish that we could all go out and conquer the world together, but we are always in different life stages, in different places, and it is probably best that we keep our distance.
I feel like I have lost a week due to sickness, I feel like I am not doing as well as I should in school, in life, but I think it is ok. I think most things are always ok, as long as you don't allow them to get bigger than you. I've got goals, I am just not sure what they are yet. I trust they will manifest themselves eventually, as long as I keep myself moving in some sort of direction. Happy? It's a new thing I've been learning. I am talking non-sense (as usual). I must pretend to sleep or write, something productive.